blairies · english · music

Fatter Happier

Fitter, happier, more productive,
Not drinking too much,
Regular exercise at the gym
(Three days a week),
Getting on better with your associate employee contemporaries,
At ease,
Eating well
(No more microwave dinners and saturated fats),
A patient better driver,
A safer car
(Baby smiling in back seat),
Sleeping well
(No bad dreams),
No paranoia,
Careful to all animals
(Never washing spiders down the plughole),
Keep in contact with old friends
(Enjoy a drink now and then),
Will frequently check credit at (moral) bank (hole in the wall),
Favors for favors,
Fond but not in love,
Charity standing orders,
On Sundays ring road supermarket
(No killing moths or putting boiling water on the ants),
Car wash
(Also on Sundays),
No longer afraid of the dark or midday shadows
Nothing so ridiculously teenage and desperate,
Nothing so childish, at a better pace,
Slower and more calculated,
No chance of escape,
Now self-employed,
Concerned (but powerless),
An empowered and informed member of society
(Pragmatism not idealism),
Will not cry in public,
Less chance of illness,
Tires that grip in the wet
(Shot of baby strapped in back seat),
A good memory,
Still cries at a good film,
Still kisses with saliva,
No longer empty and frantic like a cat tied to a stick,
That’s driven into frozen winter shit
(The ability to laugh at weakness),
Healthier and more productive
A pig in a cage on antibiotics.

Radiohead – Fitter Happier

Did you seriously quote the whole lyric to begin your blog post? — Yes, all of them, baby.

Are you sick or something? —Huft..sakitnya tuh disini!!


please stop asking me naggy questions, you imaginary judge in my head! It’s a fun song. The whole lyric is filled with sarcasm. It’s cruel to use sarcasm as your everyday language style to interact with other people formally, I agree.. but using sarcasm in a song is like pouring secret seasonings.  It make the song beautiful and rich with flavour.

Have you heard this song? Do you love it? Or hate it?

OH, AND THE TITLE.. That was not a typo. It’s actually a common sense that most of people around me believe in. Then somehow I invented a little self-discovery theory, based on my own experience, which proves that the so-called common sense is a BS.

Let me enlighten you about this common sense. It usually happened in a reunion, where people met, and they haven’t seen each other for a quite long time. This could be a big family reunion, or a class reunion, or whatever. Then the comment-wars on those drastic changes on physical things would eventually start..

You see, when you spend your daily life with someone—or a bunch of people, let’s say your family or classmates or coworkers—you’ll find their appearances as a common sight. It’s too common you might not realize any changes on it, like slightly chubbier cheeks, a few nanometers longer hair, a shade darker skin, or maybe a bit muscular arms.

Time is the key. Those changes actually take sometimes. So when you’re in a reunion, you skip the time factor, suddenly you’ll get that “before vs. after” picture in your mind. Ta-daa!

But talk about time, my experience was somehow irrelevant.

A bit update on my whereabouts: I am studying in Kuala Lumpur, started from last month. To be honest, never in my whole life I have an idea of staying in this crows country (a few months ago, I had a ‘backpacker trip to malaysia’ with my lovely friends, and we agreed we found too much black crows in this country.. mysterious but true, I went to campus everyday with those black wings flapping over my head—And I haven’t write about our trip! Huhu wait ya jeps, za, nef, pus~). There was also some disturbing questions.. So a fellow random student—who’s somehow familiar with indonesian educational institutions—asked me, ‘What university you’re coming from?’ and then he was like, ‘What are you doing here?

Ok, that’s not annoying or even shaking a pulse on my over-thinking brain.

I’m not saying I have regrets on my decision. As the days passed since I’ve stayed here, I compared my current condition with predictions of where I planned to be.. Then I agreed this is the best scenario ever. I have no pressing issue on settling down here *crossfingers*, I could feel how I blend in with locals quite easily—since we’re actually looked similar. And almost no culture shock. Practically, I am in a foreign country but treated like a local.

And those japanese sensei. I know I will learn many things here (duh!). It sounds like a coincidence, how I also get an attachment to Japan, when my heart also attached to it. Fufufu.. I tried to analyze my own priorities and dreams in life, then realize how I’ve been unconsciously looking upon my parents and ancestor so much. I really wanted to study in my previous uni, where my parents were alumnus. Then now I’m chasing after japan, knowing my late grandfather had studied in Kyoto.. Very original, my child. Wadezig.

Anyway, for 17 months before I became ‘a student’ again, I was once a junior architect. I won’t comment much about my former working place, but one thing: I’ve lost nearly 15 pounds of my body weight. That’s a comparison between initial weight (a few months after graduation, early 2013) and final weight (around august 2014).

Now I actually wonder why I wrote this?? So embarassing. -__-“

I’ve only realized this ‘phenomenon’ after measuring it and looking at the numbers first hand.. In reality, I feel my body just as normal as I ever be. Then weird comments came from the family. Something like:

Teh, waktu jaman mahasiswa hepi ya.. Sekarang udah kerja mah cape? (You must had been happy studying in uni, now working in office.. a bit tiring isn’t it?)


Ih, ulah kurus teuing teh, asa sieun ningalina. (Don’t be too thin.. you looked horrible.)


Karunya incu nini meni begang.. engke di malaysia ngalintuhan, nya! Emam sing seueur! (What a pity, my tiny granddaughter.. get fatter in malay, ok? Eat more!)

And it’s not like we’re having a reunion or whatever. We meet each other everyday! I specifically disagree with two things: One, I am not thin. But this is widely subjective, since I’ve seen my own body more then the family, maybe.. or I’m just totally clueless. Two, I might be stressed out in office, but I don’t think I had a perfect life in university either. I’ve had my own share of depressing moments back then.. Being an architecture student is never easy, you know!! Even without additonal problems from social life and other hidden agendas.

So I formulated this rough theory of happiness vs. body weight. Trying to understand a bit psychosomatics even when I have no idea.. 😀

Happiness vs. Weight © mia 2014

This might even unapplicable to anyone but myself. LOL. Since everyone have different habits on facing depressing problems. Some tends to eat more, some tends to have no apetite. But think of it rationally: when the problem is still durable, no matter how bad it is, you tend to do something, right? Even when the thing you do is irrelevant and not solving any problems you have.. So you ran away to food, feeding your body so much when what you actually need is some medication for your heart, mind, and soul.

Meanwhile if your problem really essential: like questioning your own existence, your sole values in life.. then the problems took your time and energy so much, you can’t even feed yourself properly. You’ve reached your limits and you need to be rescued!

In my case, I’m not sure whether I’ve reached the emergency limit or simply moved to a fitter life. Haha.

However, if being fit means doing all that radiohead told you in fitter happier, who wants it? I’d rather being a little bit unfit, with a fair share of happiness and sadness.. so that everytime I find happiness, I’ll remember to be grateful.

Because without pain, how would we know happiness?


Source: Pusfita Handayani’s Path

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